so, i hear you ask, what do i do with my time now that i come home obscenely early every day to not revise? well, as you might know, i�m moving continents at the end of july, so i�m gonna have to sell my london home.

we�re about to release our house, and yes, i know, two months is risky especially now that no-one wants suburban houses anymore (those home-improvement-with-intention-of-selling shows are fast replacing changing rooms... i mean, is that still on?). and so, we have been making our house extra, extra nice. it really is. i spent an hour and a half ironing an anal, canvas-y type, bed-covering thing , which has been sitting in the linen cupboard for years now, accumulating recalcitrant creases that only come out if you press a scalding hot iron on it with all your body weight until it smokes. (yeah, that�s my idea of living dangerously: not quite burning bed-linen.)

another thing i have been doing it watching visuals on iTunes. you know, the function where the computer generates pretty, changing, bending, spiralling colours to the music. it�s completely pointless but utterly hypnotising. i�m pretty sure steve jobs is washing my brain right now as i watch those greens and oranges and now purples explode on screen while matt hales sings about �filing down a hangnail�, something which is stupid as hangnails are skin, not actual nail, and therefore cannot be filed. (which reminds me, every time i get out of a toilet cubicle, i think of ben hales and his not-so-clever observation that toilet cubicle doors only open inwards in spain.)

back to what steve jobs is saying via the iTunes visual: �buy the new iPod now. you know you want it. in fact, buy the high end �400 model now! go to apple.co.uk and click on the pretty picture link. who cares if you can�t afford it? steal! deal drugs! use your dad�s credit card! you�re leaving the country soon anyway...�|

my mum is on the phone with her mum, so i�m here, meticulously editing this entry. note the long words. i�m following in the footsteps of ben hales, king of online journal writing, but i�ll never be able to reproduce the genius of the phrase: �micturation of a backstage shower�. micturition (he spelt it wrong) is an elaborate way of saying �pissing�.

two (now 3) mentions of ben hales and only one (now 2) of his brother matt (i�ve lost the ability to type �hales�). interesting.

i have five months of archiving to do when i get online. hur-bloody-ray. and i already have 20 archives. this is going to take so long.

just came across an early matt hales adoration entry. here�s the one where i got the aqualung album from chess. that was the 16th january 2003. i think i should mark it on a calendar or something. while i�m doing the boring, i�ll show you some stats to kill time and mostly to amuse myself:

no. of entries that include the term �matt hales�: 35

�ben hales�: 10

�aqualung�: 17

�DT�: 103 (holy mother of sock!)

�michael rosenbaum�: 56

finished archiving. my diary is old! two years old in fact. bye bye.

<< ironing, being hypotised by apple and which hales brother do i love most? >>

th since 5th october 2001