hello.

the wonderful fiona from the aqualung board sent me an article from x-ray magazine featuring hales sr today. she is also the almost-stalker mentioned in said article. it's interesting. there's also a photo; the caption reads: "an exquisitely themed south-coast domicile: matt hales thrives on the harmony of a stripped pine and rose pink combo. ice-cream anyone?"

i, being an idiot, decided to transcribe it and free it from it's jpg confines. here it is:

Do you have a CLEANER: MATT HALES

Brighton's impresario of musical melancholy, Matt Hales, aka Aqualung, has a penchant for pink and a need for culinary hygiene. His kitchen must be super clean. Just don't leave any pubes in his bathroom.

Text Alexia Loundras Photography: Pav Modelski

How much money have you got?

I have earning now, where as before, really, in all honesty, I didn't have any earnings. I can now claim to have income. But my life is pretty much the same as it was. Though I get a lot of takeaways now.

What�s your favourite takeaway?

There's a Thai caf� round the corner which is fantastic. They don't deliver, but it's worth the walk � you really feel like you've earned your dinner. It's a bit like going hunting.

Do you go shopping at all anymore?

Of course I do � I haven't got a personal coterie of shoppers, though that does sound good.

How much is a pint of milk?

A pint's not enough! I buy four pints for 99p, generally from the Spar. I don't go to the supermarket anymore, unless it's my birthday or something. I quite often just buy milk and toilet roll. Basically, that's all I need. The making and drinking of tea and the using of toilet roll are, in my life, very closely connected. Especially early in the mornings.

What do you do to treat yourself?

Go to the supermarket! The idea pf getting some fruit and fruit juice and fresh vegetables � actually the idea of cooking a meal has become the treat that I can't seem to find time for. The main difference between things going well and things going badly is that you're busy. You kind of think you're busy before, but you're just making things last a bit longer to give the illusion that you're busy. Doing nothing's very tiring � it really is. It's also quite depressing. Then you think, well, maybe I'll go to bed. Then you get into bed and think ahhh, this is nice. I've got this where I just laugh hysterically if I get into bed at a particular temperature. It's so sweet, I just can't help it. I just laugh. Laugh and Laugh. And then the laughing stops and the self-hate begins when you realise it's just four in the afternoon. I don't have time for that now, thank God.

Do you have any stalkers?

A good stalker presumably keeps out of your way and you don't really realise you've got a stalker until all o a sudden they're in you bedroom. But I don't believe I have any stalkers. 'Strange and Beautiful' was almost like a stalker anthem. Maybe stalkers wouldn�t think to stalk someone they thought was a fellow stalker. They'd probably think I'd be out, stalking. Though there is this girl in Scotland who whenever I'm anywhere nearly always turns up � quite often with her mum. That can be a little unnerving at times.

Have you got any celebrity friends?

I've been learning of some celebrity fans � not sure if that counts. I'm going to wait till there's like ten of them and invite them all round for dinner. So far it's shaping up to be a hilarious evening: Helena Christiansen, Charles Saatchi and Midge Ure. Imagine those three at the dinner table. I've kind of become friends with Nitin Sawhney � is he famous? I suppose he is. Nitin's my famous friend.

Do you like housework?

I like keeping my kitchen clean � for some reason I care about that. But I can't get the same set of values to apply in the bathroom � it's got all those curvy bits and there's hair everywhere. But the kitchen � stand aside! I'm getting a granite surface for my new kitchen. It's pretty exciting � a big chunk of rock. I'm just going to spend ages touching it, resting my face on it, feeling it's ancient coolness.

What's you're favourite cleaning product?

What I tend to use is foamy water. In the bathroom, when I have to clean it, I like a bit of Mr Muscle spray. The spraying is the main thing.

Do you have designated cleaning music?

Nothing in particular, though u quite often listen to Radio 4. I like the idea that I'm being educated while I'm cleaning, or that I might hear some new current affairs, or perhaps a program about the history of the collar, which was recently an incredibly boring program on Radio 4. It was like a joke � Radio 4 was taking the piss out of itself. I had to turn that off and clean in silence.

Do you have a cleaner?

No. Am I supposed to have a cleaner?

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th since 5th october 2001